Monday, May 23, 2016

Silicon Valley Lodge Bans Wearbles from Stated Meetings

San Jose, California - San Jose Lodge No 10 in San Jose, California has banned all wearable technology from Lodge meetings effective immediately, according to the sitting Worshipful Master, Steve Gates.  Although the rest of this Silicon Valley town is very progressive on culture as well as technology, Worshipful Gates has cited privacy and security concerns as reasons for the ruling.

"It's not the fact that the Brothers carry audio and recording devices into the Lodge room," Worshipful Gates explains, "we can kindly ask the brothers to turn those off.  The challenge arises when you take into account that it records your every move."

He continues to state that the accelerometers used in these devices can accurately record masonic signs and hand gestures, as shown in the figure below.

The ban will be effective until the Worshipful Master's successor has been elected and installed.  The Senior Warden plans on continuing this tradition until more information is available.

Last year, Luddite Lodge #1899 in Vortex, Kentucky had a similar ban on fitness wearables.  Although no significant security benefits have been realized to date, the Lodge has noticed an average member weight gain of 12.4 pounds since the ban.

-Knight Kadeuch, Kennedy MacFaulty, 69˚ of the Mediocre Elu


  1. isn't it up to the Grand Lodge of that state to make that rule and not individual lodges

  2. Besides the fact that this is a satirical website; as long as it doesn't contradict the landmarks of Masonry or any Grand Lodge rules, a Worshipful Master could in theory do this.