Monday, March 20, 2017

Job's Daughters International issues new trademark infringement lawsuit

Papillion, NE - This week, the leadership of Job's Daughter's International, still bitterly waging a litigation war against a clothing designer in Washington State, announced its intent to serve a summons to none other than the Great Architect of the Universe (GAOTU)--known colloquially as "God"--for trademark infringement due to the Biblical story of Job. Sources close to JDI Supreme Headquarters, who spoke to The Past Bastard on the condition of anonymity for fear of being shunned and summarily expelled from the order without just cause, stated that the JDI leadership has their eyes on the Bible for quite some time: "Job's Daughters leadership is well aware that the Bible printing industry is the most profitable book industry in the world. They feel that, as trademark holders to the Job name and story, they should receive their fair share or, if all else fails, get the Book of Job removed from the Bible altogether. They find it offensive that God is profiting off of their intellectual property, and they want to put an end to it."
The Past Bastard reached out to the JDI Supreme Headquarters in Nebraska for comment. Bro. Joe Snow, spokesperson for the JDI Supreme Headquarters, remarked: "This case is quite clear. Job's Daughters International owns all trademarks and copyrights to the name and story of Job. It doesn't matter if God had the story written down first; the fact of the matter is He didn't copyright it and we did. I'm afraid He really doesn't have a leg to stand on."

When asked about the Job's Daughters' desire to remove the Book of Job from the Bible, Bro. Snow explained: "Of course we don't want to eradicate the story of Job. We simply want to limit the availability of unauthorized versions. The myriad different translations of the Bible that exist today dilute the true story of Job and really make it difficult for our girls to memorize their ritual. After this mess is behind us, we here at Job's Daughters promise that anyone who wants to read the Book of Job will be able to purchase the Official Licensed Edition(TM) from our e-commerce site!"

-SK Bro. Mason Buhrmaster

8 comments:

  1. I call GAOTU to the witness stand to give his defence...

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    1. "So help me me..."

      http://video.anyclip.com/movies/oh-god/god-on-the-stand/

      Delete
  2. This wouldn't be the first time someone in Nebraska sued God.

    Good ol' Ernie Chambers did it here first.

    http://www.ketv.com/article/state-sen-ernie-chambers-sues-god/7610332

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  3. This web site is awful and detrimental to the Craft. The brother who writes it should be ashamed.

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    Replies
    1. Amen. Its detrimental to all Orders that are a part of the Masonic Families.

      Delete
  4. I believe a healthy dose of satire is needed in life, and from my expierence and personal knowledge of the situation informative.

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  5. This whole thing is is disgusting, how dare anyone allow this. Who cares how upset anyone is, my daughter has been personially been affected by this and has been denied because of this. So the point that daughters ARE GOING to see this, this makes it very clear you are just as bad as the ones in charge of the Law Suit. EVERY single ADULT that has taken part of this should hang their head I shame. You all scream its for the kids, but I scream Bull! When was the last time any one involved with the real law suit actually did anything with the Jobie state daughters???? They haven't, that's because most of them are a bigger part of Rainbow and Demoly. So why destroy Jobs Daughters, because you ARE ONLY HURTING DAUGHTERS, no matter what you say. I see it first hand and I've never been apart of any of this because it's all dumb, EVER SIDE!

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    1. THANK YOU for your FEEDBACK. I APPRECIATE you taking the time to record PERSONAL EMPHASIS by writing in all capital letters. Your writing/meaning would have been unintelligible otherwise. -MB

      Delete