Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Lodge efforts to have members meet on the level draws cheers and sneers

Beaver, OK -- Anxious to consolidate several cliques in his lodge, new Worshipful Master Casey Jones instituted a dress code into Curly McLain Lodge No. 642, something that had never been done before, and it's been met with both praise and criticism.

WM Jones decided that for his year, he asked that nobody show up in jackets and ties, nor even "business casual" khakis and polo shirts. Instead, he instructed all of the officers to head down to Tractor Supply in nearby Guynon, and pick up a pair of overalls and a white cotton shirt.

"A century or more ago, Freemasons wore white gloves to indicate that they were all on the level," explained WM Jones. "We're doing the same thing in our lodge -- by making everyone wear overalls, we won't see any distinction between the blue collar and the white collar guys in our lodge. Rich, poor, or in between won't matter. By making the outer apparel all the same, we'll have to focus on what's inside."][

Not everyone is crazy about the idea, though. The Past Bastard contacted several lodge members to ask for their views.

"If you ask me, the guy is a nutty as a fruitcake," said WB Ned Geinz, currently serving as Junior Warden. "Look, don't get me wrong, we love that he's a new guy who's excited, and wants to bring in some new ideas. But not all of the guys here can afford to buy these fancy dress overalls, and especially to not wear them for anything else but lodge."

RWB John Wayne Gacey, currently serving as Junior Deacon, had a different perspective.

"This all started when some of the guys were reading that Dummies blog, and they seen some guys dressed in ripped shirts and jeans. A few of us thought that maybe it couldn't hurt to class the place up once in a while, and act like proper gentlemen. Personally, I'm glad young Casey made that rule."
Several of the district officers have expressed concerns that the trend might extend to other lodges, and that the district officers, themselves, might be compelled to follow suit. However, the Grand Lodge of Oklahoma shows no signs of adopting the dress code.

"We're a very liberal grand lodge," said RWB Howard Johnson, Grand Lodge spokesperson. "At this time, we're fine if the members of McLain Lodge want to dress things up a bit."


  1. Man, somebody must have been in a dark place when they decided to sprinkle JWG in...

  2. Ooiee - y'all done stepped in it again!!! Everybody knows that true Okies only wear Rownd Howse overalls.

  3. The funny thing is that this article is supposed to be satire. Fellas I know have been wearing bib overalls to country lodges, fundraisers, and practices for decades, and considering the size of their equators - I'm really glad they do.